Subject: Grail-"Last Look Back"-'Sisters Under The Skin' (Mallory, Hargen)

{OOC: My apologies to the crew for the great delay in the posting of

this chapter. I was unable to post for the last week due to RL

problems, but I should be back now. I apologize especially to Jason

(aka. Eve) who has been waiting patiently for me to return. Here comes

the first part quite a series of posts.}

-------

Lt(jg) Eve Mallory

Chief Science Officer

LtComm Janice Hargen

Chief Engineering Officer

<<Stardate: 47307.17 - 11:35>>

<<Science Lab 4>>

Janice Hargen's hands were shaking. She cursed herself,

rubbing her hands together to keep them from trembling,

but to no avail. Her heart was just beating too fast.

She was standing outside the door of Science Lab 4, trying

to muster up the courage so that she could enter and finally

face Eve Mallory. Janice was sure that Eve knew about her...

condition. She was the second person on the ship to

discover it, the first being the ship's new captain, Epic

Terrakian. Janice now had to face her worst nightmare -

again. It was no wonder her hands were shaking so.

She was completely unaware of the conversation being held

right down the hallway, between Logan Castle, and the new

feline security officer Ensign Tifa Charr. Her mind was only

on one thing. Which was a wonder, because her mind was

rarely only on one thing. Janice tended to take advantage

of her mechanical ability to concentrate on several hundred

things at once.

Which was the entire problem. She was an android. And it

was killing her inside. She hated what she was. It brought

her to tears more times than she could count. Of

course, if she had not been an android, then she doubted

that the USS Grail would still be sitting here in one piece, for

it was her positronic network that allowed her to integrate

herself with the ship's computer and accelerate the repairs.

But she hated what she was nonetheless. She would have

rather blown up with the ship if she could only be a real

human for five minutes.

Janice blinked back the tears that were forming in her eyes.

She had to get control of herself. This was going to be

one of the hardest things she was going to have to do.

She just didn't think she had the energy. She was so

mentally and physically drained from the integration that

she didn't know how much longer she could stay standing,

let alone face Eve Mallory and her greatest fear. But she

had to nevertheless. She didn't know how many people

knew what she was, whether Eve had discussed this with

her assistant, or told the entire ship. She was going into

this blind and she hated it.

But Janice did have one special secret. A certain piece of

information, that when combined with other things that

she had observed over time, might lend itself to her aid at

the right moment. Everyone had their little dark secrets.

Janice prayed that she was right.

She bit her lip as she noticed her hand was still shaking as

she reached for the keypad next to the door in order to

open it. She didn't even see Castle's curious expression as

he stood in the hallway watching her. She fingered the

right code to open the door and entered.

-------

Eve picked up the cable and studied the end of it. Too

many questions, not enough answers. Just like her. How

did Hargen get a positronic matrix in here? Why? And

why wasn't it registered in this database that Lirzinji'kav

had mentioned? It also wasn't on any record of Hargen's

possessions that were listed in the ship's database; at

least that Lirzinji'kav had been able to find.

Questions without answers. Just like her.

When the Alonzo had fallen apart around her, and she'd

taken an electro-magnetic charge that had shorted out

her cybernetic neural implants, she'd thought she was

dead. Waking up aboard the Nova had been a shock,

but nothing to compare to the surprise of discovering

that not only was she alive, she was apparently fully human.

For one long second, she'd thought she was dreaming,

that her desire to be normal, to be human, had once

again given her those wonderful happy times that she

sometimes experienced while asleep. She hated waking up

from them worse than the more frequent nightmares.

But then she'd discovered 100 years had passed. And

it all came crashing down on her. The Alonzo had found

the Machine Race after all. Only like V'jur, they'd sent her

back again.

After she'd recovered from the shock, questions bubbled

up; Why her and not any of the others? Where *were* the

others? Why 100 years? What had happened? Why

couldn't she remember?

All those questions and others where asked of her many

times during the initial briefing on Lerins Station and

during the long boring de-briefing on Earth, and during

the exhaustive tests Starfleet had subjected her to.

And she had only been able to answer one of those, once

she'd... connected with that Borg. Why had she been sent

back? To help fight them, to find a way to beat them.

Because where a warrior might fail, a scientist would find a

way.

But although she might seem human, even down to the

molecular level, (a feat of engineering that scared even the

Vulcan's on the team assigned to 'study' her), she wasn't.

Her cybernetics may be gone, she may look (and feel) as

normal and as human as Janice Hargen was, but her dream

of just being ....well... normal was still as far away as it had

been before.

She turned the cable over in her hands, and heard the door

hiss open. She looked up, and saw Lt. Commander Hargen

come in.

-------

The room was just like Janice had remembered. It had been

less than an hour ago that she was last in here. But there

was a change, and Janice's heart stopped when she saw it.

A certain familiar relay cable was still attached to a terminal

in the corner of the room. She almost broke into tears when

she saw it. She swallowed, hard.

Hargen came to a halt a few feet away. Eve got a look at her

face, and even for someone who was oblivious to what other

people where thinking and feeling as she often was, Hargen's

fear and panic were obvious. For a moment, she looked as

though she might even cry, then her face was calm again.

It was only her eyes that reflected her mood.

"You requested my presence, Lieutenant Mallory?" Janice

asked, startled by the calm in her voice. A calm that she did

not feel.

Eve turned to face her, and saw the other woman's eyes

widen and fix on her jacket. She glanced down herself, and

saw to her annoyance the huge melted burn. What the

disruptor had started, the plasma had continued; widening

the burn around the charred edges. And now that she

looked, there was a certain weakness around the seams of

the garment.

She looked up and shrugged. "My apologies for my

appearance, Lt. Commander, I didn't notice which jacket I

was putting on." She held up the end of the cable. "I was

hoping you could help me with something."

"Such as?" Hargen *was* nervous. But why this level of

fear? Smuggling a positronic network on board wasn't a

crime as such...

"According to Ensign Lirzinji'kav here..." Eve indicated

the Cygnan, who had returned his attention to the

computers again, and was probably oblivious to what was

being said. "...This cable was used to attach a positronic

network to the computer, and then used to maintain shield

and weapon modulation at a much faster and more

efficient rate than would otherwise be available." She

paused. "He also tells me that this room was locked out on

your authorization, and the replicator also commanded to

create this," she twirled the cable. "again by your

authorization. He also checked, and during the period of

time this was all going on, you were not on the bridge."

Hargen didn't say anything, but for a moment Eve was

worried she was going to pass out; her skin had taken

on a very pale shade.

"So," Eve continued. "I was wondering if you could tell

me what happened. And where you managed to get a

positronic network from?"

A thousand thoughts ran through Janice's mind - a

thousand excuses. But none that Eve Mallory would

believe. That at least was obvious. But what wasn't

obvious was what she was going to do about it.

"May we speak in private?" she asked, indicating Ensign

Lirzinji'kav in the corner of the room.

Eve nodded. "Lirzinji'kav." There was no reply.

"Lirzinji'kav!" She put a bit more force into it that time.

He looked up, faint annoyance on his face. "Yes?"

"Go to the Core and run a level 3 diagnostic. I want a

full report when it's done."

The Cygnan blinked. "But I already ran a level 1...."

"Well, do it again." Eve interrupted. "Now."

Lirzinji'kav let out a deep 'I'm-surrounded-by-idiots' sigh

and left the room, muttering quietly to himself. Neither

Eve or Janice knew that Logan had given the ensign an

even more curious look as he saw him leave the lab that

Janice had just entered.

Janice waited for Eve complete telling the computer that

she wanted a lock on the doors and watched as Eve

waited expectantly. Janice was using this time to get

control of herself. She needed it so terribly. She wished

she had someone to lean on - someone to make it all

better. But she was alone. She had always been alone,

completely dependent on herself and only herself.

Janice walked over to the relay and fingered it lazily.

She managed to look nonchalant about it, but the moment

her fingers touched the cable her heart stopped. *She

makes it look like she doesn't know anything. But she has

to know. What else could it be? It's so obvious!* Janice

wanted to believe that Eve didn't know what she was.

She wanted to believe it so badly. But there was too

much evidence. There was too much that would make it

easy for her to discover the truth. If she didn't know it

now, then she would soon.

"Lieutenant, I need to know exactly how many people

know about this procedure... about exactly what happened

in here. That is an order." Janice made her voice like steel,

but behind it she was ready to collapse. This is what she

needed to know.

Eve looked at her curiously, startled by the sudden iron

in her voice. "Just Ensign Lirzinji'kav and I. Why?"

Janice stifled a sigh of relief. That was almost confinable,

depending on how loudmouthed that ensign was. She had

to be sure to track that down as soon as possible. She

blinked, leaning against the terminal wearily. She was so

exhausted - it would be so easy just to lay down and take

a little nap right now...

Janice shook her head furiously. She had to keep her mind

on track no matter how hard it was. She rubbed her temples

forcing herself to think. She had to figure out how to go

about this so she didn't reveal any more than she had to.

"Eve... what happened to your jacket?"

Eve blinked in surprise; at the change of subject and at the

sudden use of her first name. "I was shot." She said.

"I had a talk with Ensign Charon today. You remember him,

don't you? He accompanied you on the away mission. He

was telling me about some odd occurrences during the

mission. Like a disruptor blast that hit a certain officer on

the mission. And a plasma leak that the same officer survived.

It just seemed curious to me that one officer could survive

so much. What do you think?"

Eve watched her for a moment. It was obvious that Janice

Hargen was trying to divert the conversation. But why?

If she knew what had happened to her, and was trying to

use it for some kind of blackmail, it wasn't going to work.

She'd never seen the point of the classification of who and

what she was and had decided privately that she wasn't

going to hide it. Or course, when you get shot by a Romulan

Disruptor and survive, and then survive standing in a

plasma leak, secrets are more or less irrelevant.

*So, fine. Let's come clean, and see what she does. Maybe

I'll get some answers.*

"Curious, if I were organic, yes." Eve replied. "But I'm not."

She turned. "Computer, download Personal File: Mallory

zero zero one and display on main screen."

[Acknowledged]

The large screen on the far wall lit up with data. Eve turned

back to Janice. "That's what I am."