((OOC: Greetings dear, dear fellow simmers ;) So wonderful posts I had the privilege to read since we started on this new adventure... I'm so sorry I didn't get the chance to write sooner, but I'm sure many of you will understand when I say that one single word : finals. They kept me busy for two weeks, after what I did my best to catch up on a sim which fed my mailbox with new messages at warp speed (those of you who sim along on Atlantis/Beta 2 will know what I mean!). Sick of reading, I started to go through the Grail mail (hehe), and what a surprise I had! I couldn't stop reading till I reached the last message. This is going to be a great sim, I feel it, with such talented writers as you are all. Not to mention our GM ;) Well, I'll save you the OOC novel. Here's my post. It is incomplete, but first thing tomorrow, when I get up, I'll bring Cara to the meeting room and I'll finally be up to date. End OOC.))

'Blues'

By Lt. Cara Hatcher

Chief Tactical Officer, USS-Grail

Cara exited the ready room with no ceremony. She had carefully listened to what the commander had to say; all in all, he had sung the same song she had heard from each of her previous commanding officers. The same speech she had heard over 100 times in her lifetime, that meant that "Because of your known, frequent violent outbursts, I will have to keep a close eye on you".

But, this man had also showed a deep understanding of the importance of her job. He had even said she would be his 'sage'. The idea left Cara somewhat thoughtful, though she was about certain she would be able to meet his expectations. She may not be perfect, she may only have little control over her emotions, but she was still capable of great accomplishments.

She had to admit that the challenge of meeting dozens of new species was very appealing to her. Studying their war techniques, finding their weaknesses... Very stimulating for a young, talented tactical officer who had been assigned to dull Starfleet missions most of the time, spending the rest of it in the brig or at a remote penal colony, from which colony her assignment to the USS-Grail had just saved her. But to what price ?

Cara made her way to her quarters. Upon her arrival she had thrown her light suitcase on the bunk, promising herself that she'd start unpacking as soon as she would have a chance to come back here. It seemed like now was the time.

The unpacking process took no time at all - besides the clothes and the essential accessories, she had only brought two things. A portrait of her adoptive mother, and her favorite holo-program, a multi-style martial arts training program.

Martial art was a passion for Cara. Through it she had learned a bit of self-control, and it had helped her to tame part of her wild nature. Only part of it, because you can't completely neutralize half of your existence no matter how hard you put your mind to exercise.

There was a third item she had brought onboard with her. Something she didn't wish to share with anyone. She took the medium-sized wooden box and carefully hid it under her bunk, replacing the sheets so that it was invisible from anywhere in the room. This item would no doubt prove useful someday, maybe in a not-so-distant future.

She threw a glance of satisfaction around the room. The quarters were still empty, but already, with no more suitcase in sight, they felt more like 'home'. She smiled wryly at her last thought. Home. What did that mean, anyway. For years, the streets of San Francisco had been her home. Then, she had found her adoptive family, Kristen Hatcher and her husband. A few ships had also been her temporary home. Then, the Penal settlement. The closest thing to a real 'home' she had ever had was probably the years she spent with Kristen. But now she was being torn away from her family for good, she was sure about that. Better make a home on the Grail right away.

[Incoming message from Admiral Kristen Hatcher], the computer chirped interrupting her daydreaming. Cara promptly walked to the communications terminal sitting on her desk, at the other side of the room.

"On screen", she commanded. The pale face of a 50 years-old woman appeared.

"Mother." Cara said simply. The woman stared at her daughter in complete silence for several long seconds. Cara had never seen her mother cry while she was in uniform, but now she noticed the tear-filled eyes of Kristen. She felt shaken at the sight, and sorry she had to put her through all this. But that would be over soon. In a matter of days they would be departing, and in a matter of years she was sure her mother would stop thinking about her.

She had no idea how wrong she was. So many years Kristen had spent trying to make something out of Cara, out of the thief she had adopted a decade ago. She had half-succeeded, but one thing was certain, she loved her, loved her as a mother loves her child. No matter what she did, no matter where she ended up and why she ended up there, Kristen loved her and would always do, even across the Galaxy that would soon separate them both.

"Cara. Dearest." Her voice was nothing more than a whining whisper. "I know you'll be busy preparing your departure in the next days, so I guess it is better to say goodbye now..."

"I guess so", Cara answered, as she moved her hand forward and brushed the screen with her fingertips. The older woman did the same, and for a brief instant their hands seemed to touch. Cara couldn't find words to express what she felt at that moment. She would have liked to prepare for her last encounter with her mother, but it had came in unexpected. So she was there, facing the terminal, helpless.

Kristen Hatcher began to sob silently, but forced a smile onto her face. "When you get back, my baby, you'll have a lifetime worth of stories to tell your old mother..."

"I won't be coming back, mother, Cara interrupted. You know that as well as I do. But for once your influence couldn't do anything for me. That's the truth. Why try to hide it from us?" A hot tear ran down her cheek. "At the other end of the Galaxy I won't be a threat to any Starfleet officer anymore. I'm sure that's how your bunch of fellow admirals all think."

Kristen was truly hurt by her daughter's words. She was speechless. She stared at Cara, unable to believe that words so crude had came out of her daughter's mouth. Sometimes she liked to imagine her as a gentle, sweet child, but reality was brutally different, and she had just been reminded. "Cara, she whispered. I'm so sorry. I did all I could do to try to save you from that..."

"I know. I love you mother... See you in another life." There was now a cascade of tears running down both her cheeks. She couldn't hold them back, and didn't try. "And mother ?" The woman looked up. "Thank you." Kristen painfully smiled. These were the last words they exchanged. Cara cut the communication and threw herself on her bunk, closing her watery eyes.

***

/\ Commander Terrakian to Lt. Hatcher /\

Cara jumped and checked her chronometer. She had been asleep for only fifteen minutes, but was already in the middle of intense dreams.

"Hatcher here." she said, trying to hide the tears left in her voice.

/\ This is just to inform you that there will be a staff meeting tomorrow, 1000 hours. Your presence is required./\

"Very well. I'll be there. Hatcher out."

She set her alarm to wake her up at 830 the next morning. She wanted to be in great shape for the meeting, both mentally and physically speaking. A long night of sleep and a good workout in the morning should do the trick. She hoped that her mind would quiet down about her mother before the end of the night...

((To be continued... tomorrow morning ! I have to sign off myself for now.))